Her husband died of cancer, and her father died after a long
battle with Parkinson’s disease. Her mother was diagnosed with cancer. She
moved across the country from Seattle to Fairfield County, Connecticut, after
selling the home that she had lived in for 26 years.
اضافة اعلان
In her devastation, she noticed that she felt better when
she looked for the good parts of each day. So, she took a large Mason jar and
turned it into a “gratitude jar,” which she now keeps on her nightstand.
Every night, she writes down a few things for which she is
grateful on a scrap of paper and drops it inside. They are often as simple as
“I met a new neighbor” or “I took a walk with the dog and my mom.”
“The grief is still there,” said Batten, 56. “But writing
those daily notes has helped.”
Two decades ago, a landmark study led by psychologist Robert
Emmons sought to understand how people benefit from gratitude, a question that
scientists had rarely explored until then.
Emmons’ findings — which suggested that gratitude may
improve psychological well-being — inspired a spate of additional research. To
date, numerous studies have found that having a grateful outlook, “counting
one’s blessings” and expressing gratitude to others can have positive effects
on our emotional health as well as on interpersonal and romantic relationships.
Gratitude can benefit physical health
In addition, some studies, but not all, have shown that
gratitude can benefit physical health.
“Gratitude heals, energizes and changes lives,” Emmons said.
“It is the prism through which we view life in terms of gifts, givers, goodness
and grace.”
Here is more about why gratitude is so powerful and how can
we incorporate it into our daily lives.
What is gratitude?
Gratitude is a positive emotion that can arise when you
acknowledge that you have goodness in your life and that other people — or
higher powers, if you believe in them — have helped you achieve that goodness.
In other words, the sources of the good things “lie at least
partially outside the self,” Emmons said.
You might feel gratitude when someone is kind to you, for
example.
But “feeling it is only half the equation,” said Philip
Watkins, a professor of psychology at Eastern Washington University and the
author of “Gratitude and the Good Life.” Expressing gratitude is equally
important to reap the benefits of this emotion, he said.
How does it benefit you?
Many studies have asked participants to write letters of
thanks or to list the positive things in their lives, and then measured the
effects of those acts.
The results suggest that performing these types of
activities provides mental health benefits — reducing symptoms of depression
and anxiety, increasing self-esteem, and improving satisfaction with daily
life.
However, some studies have noted that gratitude
interventions are not necessarily more effective than other kinds of activities
to enhance well-being, such as asking people to write about the details of
their day.
Even so, that doesn’t make gratitude activities any less
useful, the experts said.
Multiple studies have shown that expressing gratitude to
acquaintances, co-workers, friends, or romantic partners can offer a
relationship “boost” and “helps bind us more closely,” said Sara Algoe, a
psychologist at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill who has
researched how gratitude aids relationships.
What’s more, when analyzing people’s dispositions,
researchers have found that those who are more prone to experience gratitude in
their daily lives have lower levels of depression and sleep better.
And not only does gratitude improve the well-being of the
giver and the recipient, but it may also be good for those who witness it:
Watching an act of gratitude between two people can cause an observer to feel
more warmth and affinity toward them both.
One moment a day is enough.
The studies on gratitude don’t indicate how often we ought
to express gratitude or how best to put it into practice.
Indeed, many experts believe that a small dose of gratitude,
once a day, is ideal.
“I think the benefits of gratitude activities truly unfold
through long-term habits,” said Joel Wong, a professor of counseling psychology
at Indiana University's School of Education, who is studying whether expressing
gratitude in a six-week group program can help people with depression.
To develop an enduring gratitude habit, try linking your
gratitude practice to an already ingrained routine, Wong said. He chooses to
think about what he’s grateful for in the morning.
“I try to do it when I first turn on the computer at work,”
he said.
Finally, although many studies have shown the value of
writing a letter expressing appreciation, it doesn’t have to be lengthy or
time-consuming. A quick email or text can do the trick.
Be specific.
Imagine that your partner is thanking you for cleaning up
the kitchen after dinner. Which statement would you rather hear?
“Thank you!”
Or: “I am grateful that you took the reins and handled all
the kitchen duties tonight. I love how we take turns to give one another a
break.”
Specificity matters “because it deepens our experience of
gratitude,” Wong said. “It intensifies our grateful emotions and thoughts.”
Wong has created a list of 100 questions that may serve as
useful prompts when thinking about gratitude in a more specific way, whether
you are thanking someone else or listing the things in your life that you feel
grateful for.
When doing this exercise, Wong suggests putting pen to
paper.
“The act of writing slows down our thinking process and
allow us to ponder more deliberately,” Wong said. “By writing, we retain a
permanent record of our blessings; we can return to our gratitude journaling
months or years later to recall what we were grateful for.”
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