Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, commonly known as ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder first diagnosed during childhood; it usually lasts into adulthood. Dealing with a child who has ADHD can be overwhelming for a parent, and can come with a set of challenges during different stages of their growth and development.
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Clinical treatment of ADHD
In most cases, parents are encouraged to follow the first
preferred line of treatment, agreed upon by professionals and specialists in
the field, which is
behavioural therapy, especially for younger children,
before introducing medication.
Children with ADHD experience symptoms of inattention and
hyperactivity which contribute to their difficulty controlling their impulses and finishing
tasks, as well as being overly active. There is no rule book for ADHD, every
case can look different and might vary in symptoms and severity. So what works
best for a child and his/her family will, in turn, vary as well.
While following a treatment plan that may combine a certain
dose of medication along with behavioural therapy can prove to be very
beneficial for the child, that is not a luxury that all families can afford.
And even with therapy and medication, parents still need to adopt a lifestyle
that caters to the best interest of their child, and that includes introducing
and following different strategies at home.
As the parent, it is vital to stay updated on recent
developments in the research field of ADHD. Most recent studies have linked
AHDH with underlying genetic factors, as well as other environmental and
neurodevelopmental factors as possible main causes. So, it is important to note
that, contrary to popular belief, eating too much sugar, excessive screen time,
and other social factors will not cause your child to have ADHD, but what such
habits can do is exacerbate existing symptoms, making them all the more
difficult to manage.
Have structure and consistency
To begin with, the first and most important key to the
success of any strategy is consistency. Providing structure for your
child is
your best bet at limiting sudden distractions. This comes with having a clear
daily schedule and routine. Knowing what to expect on a day-to-day basis will
calm your child and allow them time to mentally prepare for required tasks. The
schedule you set should account for as many, and preferably, all hours of the
day. This includes their sleep schedule, meal times, study and play time,
sports and other activities, as well as their screen time. In addition,
providing them with a clean, organized working space is just as important.
Encouraging
physical activity is another fundamental step to
take. Allowing a child with ADHD to have time dedicated to releasing their
excess energy in a healthy and productive manner will stimulate their brain and
promote focus and concentration.
Besides signing them up for a team sport, you can also spend
quality time as a family by going on hikes or playing outdoors. Make sure you
have different toys, such as a bike, balls and skipping rope available as well.
Some studies have shown that even having a stress ball or a fidget toy can help
children relax their mind and body and reduce stress, due to their quiet and
easy-to-handle nature. It is best to contact your child’s school and ask for an
allowance to be made for your child to have their stress ball with them at hand
during class.
Break it down
The next step to take is breaking down tasks. For a child
with ADHD, many tasks, especially ones that require considerable mental effort,
are a big challenge as they will feel too complex. The child will therefore
feel demotivated and will do anything in his/her power to avoid finishing, or
even starting them. This could happen, for example, when it is time to do
homework. It is simply unrealistic to expect that your child with ADHD will sit
down for a prolonged period of time and finish his/her work.
You have to give breaks in between, and you must break each
task down into small achievable goals; using clocks and timers has proved to be
an effective way to manage tasks and train your child to follow a set amount of
time. It is also your responsibility to remove as many possible distractions,
by keeping their surroundings uncluttered and noiseless.
Use positive reinforcement
It should come as no surprise that the best way to have good
behaviour is through positive reinforcement, specifically through praise and
encouragement. However, simply saying “good job” will not do the trick. Your
praise should be targeted and specific. Praise them for the way they cleaned up
their toys, their neat handwriting, or for the way in which they were able to
control their reactions in a specific situation.
If you feel frustrated and worried, vent to a partner or a friend instead of taking it out on your child, who is behaving in a way that is beyond his/her control.
At the same time, try not to use negative language and give
positive feedback to help build their confidence.
It can be easy for a child to feel unloved or disliked for
getting things wrong. Some parents may direct negative and hurtful comments at
their child whether they mean to or not. And while it is hard to remain
positive all the time, know that antagonizing your child will only make
disruptive behaviours worse. If you feel frustrated and worried, vent to a
partner or a friend instead of taking it out on your child, who is behaving in
a way that is beyond his/her control.
Be the calming force
When your find yourself in a challenging situation with your
child, and you feel as though things might escalate, opt for an explanation
rather than a command. Explaining why you are asking your child to do a certain
task can help alleviate their confusion as well as help reduce their
frustration and their inherent need to challenge your authority. Remaining
firm, calm and respectful will always be a better option than losing control of
your
emotions, and setting that as the example that your child will rightfully
assume is okay to follow.
One specific method to use is to give limited options. If
you children’s screen time is up and they refuse to give back their electronic
device, tell them that they have three options: either give it back to you now,
in 10 minutes, which they will most likely choose, or not give it back and have
it taken away for three days. That way you are allowing your child to
experience a sense of agency, you are spelling out consequences in advance, as
well as exhibiting a good example of being a loving yet authoritative figure in
the household.
However, remember that following through with consequences
is the only reason you should have them in the first place, otherwise it simply
defeats their purpose and will just seem cruel.
Children with ADHD have poor impulse control, so a good way
to help them regulate their emotions and reactions is through introducing
waiting time into their routine. While that will take a lot of time and
practice, working with them on waiting for a few seconds to gather their
thoughts before blurting them out will be worth it. You can practice this
through playing different impulse control games as a fun way of teaching them a
valuable and essential social skill.
In conclusion, you cannot and should not expect your child
to manage this disorder on his/her own. Children cannot help the way their
brain works, and what they all deserve and should be able to rely on is having a
support system and a parent or caregiver that is knowledgeable and will be the
calming force that takes the lead in helping them navigate through not just the
challenges, but their day-to-day life.
Set boundaries, pick your battles, keep them challenged and
busy, and keep working to modify behaviour. Most importantly, help is there and
you only have to ask. Follow professional advice and develop a good treatment
plan that includes all aspects of their life, and make changes, when needed,
along the way.
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